You look hot... Thanks so do you

Here we are at Doc's wedding (Summer of '04). Starting left we have Stubby, Hub, Heff, Cool Chief in the back, Doc (the happy groom), Mashie & Dancer hiding way back, and finally yours truly (Chag-dawg). It was an outdoor wedding and what's better than lighting up some stoggies and kickin' it with your peeps. One thing though it was hot, like really hot, I'm talkin' intant swamp-ass type hot. Doc is one of the last of all of us to get married, that's if we don't count Squirrel, who's previously stated "challenges" have kept him otherwise occupied & Heff who is a confrimed bachelor and enjoys living his life stress free & unfettered. Also, as you can see, we've got some NON-JAKE MEMBERS who slimed their way into the photo. Nothing a little "computer magic" can't take care of.

TP:

TP on the left - Heff-cat on the right.

There's another Jaker who has not been mentioned on this site yet, so I wanted to give him some air-time. I honestly don't know when TP (stands for Total Package) joined the fun on Jake Day but it had to be pretty early-on. If you bastards are going to hold a gun to my head and ask me to narrow it down I'd have to guess '96 or '97. This is not his bio so I'm not going to drone on but TP has been a valued member of the crew for some time.

This picture is taken on Jake 14 (2005) and that girl in the middle?... well I don't know who she is but she's certainly not with us.

Things we now know since Wednesday 11/23/05:

The Wednesday before Thanksgiving is always a night for some of the Jake Boys to get together. Those in attendance; Hub, Cool Chief, Doc, Chag, Rosco, Stubbs, Dancer & Lt. Stalkfleet (who came late). We went to various establishments and a fun time was had by all.

Here are some things we now know because of that night:

10. Squirrel's whereabouts are unknown at present - last report, he was jumping in his car and driving away. He's not sure of the desination or what he'll do when he gets there, but he's got a few "ideas".
9. Hub knows a shit-load about wine.
8. Since having a child, Doc has mellowed out (might have something to do with lack of sleep).
7. Jessica Simpson is one hot dame.
6. Calivn Coolage was from Vermont not New Hampshire (that was one hell of a guess though).
5. Rosco, Stubby, Doc & Chief don't "do" cigar bars.
4. Heff missed a good time (too bad he was golfing in Florida - the bastard).
3. If you want a good dessert you may have to wait 25 minutes for it.
2. Hub does "do" cigar bars but when Stubby is his ride he "doesn't".
1. Turkey is not just for Thanksgiving - it's a place where angels come from.

Coming soon...

...a short bio of all the Jake members (founders, partners, associates & juniors). This will be done over an extended period of time and hopefully written by not just me.

Boat Ride:

There were only a small handful of pictures taken on Jake 1 - which makes it all the more mystical as it fades from our memories. Here are 5 of the 9 founding members on this most historic of all Jake's. In addition to breakfast and golf we took a little boat ride. Traditionalist believe it was better when only the planner/coordinator knew the day's itinarary for Jake, leaving everyone else in the dark. This was certainly the case for our maiden adventure. In the picture starting at left we have Dancer, showing his displeasure with the papa-razzi being on board, Heff (not sure what he's doing but his hand is on my hip), Lt. Stalkfleet who seems to be checking out my huge package, then there's me and finally Doc. We were, doubtless, hiding our true identities behind those GIANT Vuarnet sunglasses which were all the rage years and years ago.

Original Jake Agenda:

Here we have the original agenda for Jake #1. As you can imagine back in 1992 we didn't have the new fangled e-mail systems we have today so we had to (get this) mail them. No, seriously we actually made copies and put stamps & addresses on them...

.......I am pausing for effect.......

Anyway - this is a great piece of history because it gives us the actual schedule of events... Well actually it really doesn't give us the schedule of events. It kinda just tells us where we are meeting for breakfast with no indication of what happens next. Still a nice bit of history and you gotta love the "JAKE" copied onto the paper as well.


Here's the updated agenda after some slight modifications. Dancer (who sent out the first one) had to go buy more stamps and re-send the agenda to everyone involved. This new agenda was more extensive albeit still sketchy and vague. One of the changes was to bring our golf clubs with us, excellent. Breakfast changed from Bickford's to HoJo's - also excellent. For my money though, the best line is "IF YOU DO NOT ATTEND, THE WRATH OF JAKE WILL FOLLOW YOU...... (not to mention you're a weak gutless fag)". Even with that, Cool Chief rolled the dice and risked it all by pulling a "no show".

Scum House:

As the bio on "who is jake" says, Jake was born in a place called "scum house" where Dancer and various family members (mostly brothers as I recall) lived for an unspecified amount of time. It was a happy place in a "hockey lockeroom" sort of way. It was a place for cards, hanging out and oh, I guess there were 1 or 2 parties there as well. Dancer and his kin were not the only ones taking up residence there however. It was speculated that a racoon burrowed his way into one of the eaves of the house. His scratching could be heard during the many card games. Good times. One time I asked one of Dancer's brothers "hey is there anything to munch on?" He said, "um yeah, I think we have a banana and maybe some mayonaise in there." Good times indeed.

The picture above is scum house back in it's hey day (late 80's early 90's) and the one below is present day scum house. My guess is some respectable people purchased the place and fixed it up to look nice... Sons-a-bitches...

yeah that's a bogey:

(left to right) Cool Chief, Squirrel, Chag (me), Doc, Heff, Lt. Stalkfleet & finally Mashie on the end. Dancer must've taken the photo.

Here we are during Jake Day in 1994 (we think) this is close to the end of the golfing portion of our day. Par 3 158 yards slightly uphill with a big-ass bunker in front (you can see it between me & Doc). Nothing really more to say except this is a cool picture mostly because no one knew it was being taken. Oh and for the record I hit my 6 iron over the green chipped on and 2 putted for bogey. I was a bogey machine back then.

Cool Chief joins the fold:

One of the absolute tragedy’s of Jake Day is that Cool Chief pictured above (2nd from the right) just didn’t make the first Jake Day. I’m not clear on the reason but suffice to say the man’s not a founding member because of it and let me tell you people, this will haunt him for the rest of his natural life. “Chiefy” was and is an integral member of our group of friends but he just happened to “mail it in” on this day of days. This picture was taken on Jake Day but no one is sure of the year. We’re kinda guessing ’94. Hail to the Chief y’all!

Others in the picture (starting at left) Heff, Mashie (wearing my jacket), Lt. Stalkfleet & Dancer at the far right.